OMFG! LIVEBLOGGING!!

I've never actually attempted to liveblog before, nor do I believe it's an actual word, nor do I believe I've spelled it correctly.

The point is, if any event in my life is worth blogging live, it is watching an episode of The Amazing Race.  Nothing shows the human condition (i.e. hatred of others) on television better than the Amazing Race. 

Not sure how this is going to go, but I can tell you that I am excited. 

HERE WE GO!!

I'm hoping they make the pegleg girl the villian, because that is what the race is all about.  Also, I hope she gets an eyepatch.

Does anyone use AOL anymore?  If so, why? 

That's one more commerical about shortening a womans period than I ever need to see again.

Did I need to be told that was the Great Wall?  I thought it was a Sheraton.

Every year we get two guys who have no idea that they're gay for each other.  One of the many reasons to love the show.

Love the gay daughter, but daddy will NEVER be able to look past it.

For the record, I never need to be told that those two girls are cheerleaders. 

"I've never known any Asian and we've never been around gay people."  - neither the first nor last shocking statement of the year from the hillbillies.

It is good to have a physical disability, I'm glad someone finally said it.

Stopped sucking on the crack pipe, started smoking pole.

Literally, those two guys couldn't get any gayer if they were having sex live on the show.

Who wants to follow a nomad?  That doesn't seem wise.

I'm against most people who are that age and go by "Duke".

How long before the Kentucky couple break out the banjos?  I give it 45 minutes.

OHHHHH! So THAT's the universal symbol for horse.  I always wondered.

Kellie = hot.  FYI

The jack is broken and I can't get it up. - I bet that's the fourth time he's said that THIS WEEK.

It's my guess that the new Gap black pant looks good on about 3 women in the country, total, and one of them is in the commercial. And dead.

I totally want the ability to switch out my foot on a whim.

Oh man, poor Miss Loretta Lynn and her hubby.

WHOA!  I love horses.  Quit your whining.

MMMMM - she said girl/girl team.

DUDE!  Does Grey's Anatomy or Desperate Housewives drag people behind horses for your entertainment?  NO!! Best show ever.

Clearly, that ox is broken.

Knots are hard.  SHUT IT!

OX FIGHT OX FIGHT!!

God willing the ox gores pegleg with one horn and condescending boyfriend with the other.

We need to get letter writing campaign together to have them put an ox in every episode of every tv show everywhere.

no, YOU shut up

Yeah, foller them.

Oh, this is awesome.

The best part of ANY relationship is when your partner screams, "I'M NOT YELLING AT YOU!"

I want one of those hats. 

Oh man, I hate car troubles.  That always seems a little unfair to me.

Dude totally got dissed on his bow to the Mongolian.

Kellie is too hot to lose this race, is my feeling.

Football stars in fake moustaches are ALWAYS funny.  An ox in a fake moustache - even funnier.  Make it happen Disney.

Shooting flaming arrows is hard, I've always said that.

Those two druggie gay guys are gonna win the whole thing, aren't they?  $1 million buys an ASS TON of crack.

Flaming gays not traditionally good at shooting flaming arrows, FYI.

Man, that redneck is giving hillbillies a bad name with that bow.

I HOPE HOPE HOPE that Rob and Kimberly stick around for a while, because one of them is BOUND to kill the other and that's just good tv.

Something tells me that's not their ONLY stupid day.

Wait, I guess it wasn't Kellie that I loved, it was the other one - Jamie.  Whatever, now they're dead.

America wants to know HOW much closer did this experience bring you?  And do you have pictures?

~~~~

Wow, a show goes by REALLY fast when you liveblog it.  Overall, I give this episode an 8 out of 10, largely due to the oxen and the chick getting dragged by her foot by a horse.  If someone would've gotten gored, it was a sure 10.  Thanks for tuning in.  See you next week.

Comments

[bob]

i don't care if she's dead. audrey's still hot. or was. or something.

[pea]

I can't believe nobody busted out with a couple of bucks for the dancing pegleg girl. That's just wrong. She puts on a good show.

[Scott-san]

Seriously, the best part of the show (looking past all the hate) is the nicknames the teams give one another. They should really do a montage (MONTAGE!) of the nicknames. This week's best: "The Bumpkins."

[Scott-san]

Oh, and this liveblogging idea is great.

[Erin]

Seriously. I just remembered you were doing this? And I freaked out and broke a whole bottle of vodka over Randy's head, just from the excitement.

P.S. This is the best post ever written by anyone, anywhere, about anything. Ever.

[anna]

that was hilarious. i've only seen the show like twice, but i still could imagine everything you were talking about.

[sar]

the ox will never stop being funny. not ever.

[jenB]

Erin just alerted me to this important public service you are performing. I don't care who knows it, i fucking LOVE the beauty queens. Although it looks like next week they cut in line before the 'mos. that just ain't right.

[erika]

Ooh, an ox with fake moustache!? Did that really happen? I didn't watch the show.

[rev_matt]

Oh man. I loved that episode, but I would've loved it even more if I'd been reading this while watching it.

The horse dragging incident was the highlight of my month. The ox rampage was the highlight of my year.

[Bill]

Dude, if I hear "dude" one more time ...

[mark]

neat idea. Although, its not as fun reading it "after-the-fact", but cool none-the-less. Btw, did you know that you can't easily get to your previous blog entry without also getting all your other entries for the month? The only way i can see is to click on september and then scroll down...or fake like you're leaving a comment and then scrolling back up to click on the prev link.

[hildur]

I almost read your blog this morning before actually getting around to seeing the show so I'm internally grateful for the title in bold, no matter how it is spelled.

The Amazing Race is still my favorite show although I still kinda miss the wrestlers and blue-haired-crazy-wife-beating guy. Than again that probably has more to do with the fact that they started that season in Iceland, oh and of course the I hate you's and the frosen implants...

I have to admit that even though I laughed out loud watching the show, your post made me laugh even harder. Can't wait for next weeks installment.

[Erin]

I just reread this, and I missed the part about The Gap black pant last night. I just almost threw up laughing. And I don't say that for effect. I seriously almost vomited, it was that funny.

[TJ]

Who knew the copy editor for the Post was a fan of Amazing Race?

Dude, I think you've arrived, CW.

[styro]

Can you pull out the cot in the basement, because I'm coming to live with you, starting tomorrow.

[Meredith]

Wow, I've never seen amazing race. And now... I am slightly tempted just to know what the hell you are talking about.

[drummergirl]

so...you really did mean next week.

[mark]

Ok, so what happened to your "pledge"?

http://www.wittandwisdom.com/home/2006/06/okay_this_time_.html

[Erin]

Your shit better be ON POINT tomorrow night, my man.

My dad says "my man". Sorry about that.